how to rule the universe in 21 days

HITPSHAMTOLAYOBLABY

Asian girls are my favourite kind of girls. If I wasn't Asian myself, I'd have an Asian fetish. It's much more to do with their culture and attitudes than it is about their looks though. Whilst I like my caucasian girl friends, I can't imagine going out with a single one of them; you can accept a lot more things in friends than you can in a partner.

But one thing that irritates me about Asian girls is the 'Hmph, I'm Too Pretty/Smart/High And Mighty To Look At You, Or Be Looked At By You' glance-turn-and-incline-nose move. We've all seen it -- when any guy walks down the street where there are Asians, and happens to come across some girl and glances at her, even momentarily, even if by accident, at least 30% of Asian girls immediately launch into HITPSHAMTOLAYOBLABY -- their faces contort into a haughty expression, their necks snap to the right, and their noses incline to 45 degrees with an error bound of less than 5 degrees. Their eyes meanwhile make a big show of conveying that their sole purpose of existing at that moment in time is in fact not to look at you and that they would prefer not to have your dirty eyes on them either thank you very much.

And the weirdest thing is, the key word in the above paragraph is ANY. it doesn't matter at all whether the girl is actually pretty/smart/miss universe or a normal average girl, or even in fact if she is mind numbingly below average, 30% of ALL Asian girls do this. It's especially infuriating when you aren't even trying to look at them, but they just come into your field of vision by virtue of walking in the opposite direction and immediately HITPSHAMTOLAYOBLABY baby! Even worse, when you haven't even looked at them but they execute a preemptive HITPSHAMTOLAYOBLABY anyway just to be safe. Worse still, when you catch them checking you out but they pull a HITPSHAMTOLAYOBLABY instead. It doesn't even matter who the guy is even, everyone seems to experience their own 30% of HITPSHAMTOLAYOBLABY, although not necessarily from the same girls. The most intriguing thing is it is apparently a reflex action. Even if the girl is internally thinking, 'hey cool looking guy, i wish i had more friends like that', outside she might be executing HITPSHAMTOLAYOBLABY automatically.

Anyway I wish I had a picture of these expressions, but if I took a picture of them it would probably elicit an ultra HITPSHAMTOLAYOBLABY. This is the closest picture i could find:



Anyone out there have good HITPSHAMTOLAYOBLABY experiences? I'd be interested in hearing the female perspective on this and whether you fall within the 30% of HITPSHAMTOLAYOBLABYers.

By the way, it pleases me to possibly be the first person to ever come up with the letter combination HITPSHAMTOLAYOBLABY in the universe. Another great distinction to add to my list of accomplishments. A short list, but a list nonetheless. In case you're wondering why I have used the word HITPSHAMTOLAYOBLABY so many times in this post, it is in preparation for the hordes of people googling HITPSHAMTOLAYOBLABY.

posted by justsomeguy @ 4:34 AM